![]() ![]() What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta. What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory. What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common? They’re both Paris sites. What did the zero say to the eight? That belt looks good on you. Related This Special Guide Will Help You Mix and Match The Colours Of Your Bridesmaid Dresses SuccessfullyĦ1. What did the two pieces of bread say on their wedding day? It was loaf at first sight. What did the police officer say to his belly-button? You’re under a vest. What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies! 58. What did Baby Corn say to Mama Corn? Where’s Pop Corn? 57. What breed of dog can jump higher than a skyscraper? Any breed of dog. We’re renovating the house, and the first floor is going great, but the second floor is another story. Wanna hear a joke about construction? I’m still workin’ on it! 54. Try the seafood diet-you see food, then you eat it. To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you. Stop looking for the perfect match use a lighter. Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. My dad told a Chemistry joke but he got no reaction. I can’t find the words for how much this bugs me. Most people can’t tell the difference between entomology and etymology. Mom is mad at me because she asked me to sync her phone, so I threw it in the ocean. If it were served warm, it would be just water. It’s inappropriate to make a ‘dad joke’ if you’re not a dad. I’m so good at sleeping that I do it with my eyes closed.Ĥ1. If two vegetarians get in an argument, is it still called beef? 38. ![]() If the early bird gets the worm, I’ll sleep in until there’s pancakes. If a child refuses to nap, are they guilty of resisting a rest? 36. I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger. I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you didn’t like it. I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now. I have a joke about trickle-down economics, but 99% of you will never get it. I had a dream that I weighed less than a thousandth of a gram. I don’t mean to sound corny, but you’re so a-maize-ing 26. I could tell a joke about pizza, but it’s a little cheesy. How does a lawyer say goodbye? I’ll be suing ya! 23. How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? 22. Related 100 Bold Truth or Drink Questions To Spice Things UpĢ1. ![]() ![]() How do you deal with a fear of speed bumps? You slowly get over it. How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans. How do astronomers organize a party? They planet. How can you tell it’s a dogwood tree? From the bark. Every night, I have hard time remembering something, but then it dawns on me. Do you know the story about the chicken that crossed the border? Me neither, I couldn’t follow it. Do you know how many people are dead at a cemetery? All of them. Did you know that milk is the fastest liquid on earth? It’s pasteurized before you even see it. Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I’m not going to go spreading it! 13. Did you hear the one about the roof? Never mind, it’s over your head. Did you hear about the square that got into a car accident? Yeah, now he’s a rect-angle! 11. Did you hear about the power outlet who got into a fight with a power cord? He thought he could socket to him. Did you hear about the man who fell into an upholstery machine? He’s fully recovered. Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems. Dad, did you get a haircut? No, I got them all cut! 7. Dad, can you put my shoes on? No, I don’t think they’ll fit me. Can February March? No, but April May! 4. Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, houses can’t jump. 6:30 is my favorite time of day, hands down. We’ve prepared a collection of 105 utterly uncool yet incredibly hilarious dad jokes ever.ġ. Whichever the occasion, dad jokes are as hilarious as they come. You can dedicate them to your dad during Father’s Day or share them with your buddies during a drinking escapade. However, the term is actually a misnomer as these jokes are applicable in just about any occasion. Dad jokes are stereotypically told by dads, hence the moniker. And that’s exactly what we like about dad jokes – the fact that the deliverer usually has no idea how simplistic and uncool their joke is. We’ve all heard them – those overly-simplistic one-liners said with sincere humorous intent, but which normally end up falling flat.
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